My Toddler’s More Popular Than Me
and some ‘Cheap Things That Are Chic’ for the playground
Dear Reader,
Last weekend was busy and fun. Saturday morning started with my 3-year-old’s soccer practice (so cute), followed by a preschool-planned playdate at the same park.
E1 recently started soccer with her best friend from school. My husband and I get along well with her friend’s parents, so it’s fun to chat with them while we’re watching the girls play.
When soccer was over, we moved over to the playground as other parents, kids, and teachers slowly started to arrive. We were there for a good amount of time, and E had a lot of fun playing with her friends as they blew bubbles, drew with chalk, swung on the swings, and rode down slides, among other kid things.
The planned park gathering was for all the different classes in E’s same grade. I had been looking forward to it with a vague intention of connecting with some of the parents at the school who I hadn’t met yet or had only met occasionally.
But other than B2, and E’s best friend’s parents who we already know, I only had brief, somewhat distracted conversations with a few others, and that was about it. Some of the other moms I know more didn’t end up coming. And not only was everyone there half-distracted by watching their own kids (to be expected), it also seemed like in general they weren’t very interested in chatting with new people and instead just stuck to the ones they already knew.
One of the moms had just approached me at a coffee shop the prior week to introduce herself. I hadn’t met her before and didn’t recognize her, but she had gone out of her way to come up to my table and make the connection (she has a daughter in another class of the same age). She mentioned she would be at the play date coming up, and after a friendly exchange, we said we would see each other at the event. I had intended to chat with her again at the park. But when the day came, we exchanged hellos, but that was about it. She had another friend there and didn’t seem very interested in chatting further.
I tried to make eye contact with others, start conversations—but my openness wasn’t exactly reciprocated.
I found myself leaving the park with a vague sense of disappointment, which I agree sounds pretty silly, and I left wondering why I was feeling that way. This isn’t normally something I would really care about. The best I could come up with was that maybe I was still in “networking mode” after my time in New York, expecting people to be interested in making new connections, and excited at the possibility of meeting new people and where it could lead. I left the play date feeling like most people just weren’t that interested in talking to me.
But how could that be? I was feeling more “sparkly” than usual. My proverbial creative cup was full after my recent trip—having held my own among smart, interesting, fashionable people. I was full of fresh ideas. I was fueled with excitement about upcoming F&M soap and lip balm product launches coming in the next few weeks (sign up here if you’re not already on our email list). I’ve embraced my rediscovered identity of “writer” and get a lot of fulfilment from writing this newsletter. I’m feeling more confident and more free, having just celebrated another birthday—and a daughter who is so much more independent than when she was a baby.
Why wouldn’t these people want to talk to me? Don’t they want to hear all the interesting things I have to say?? Don’t they know that I’m cool and smart and interesting, but also genuine and down-to-earth and don’t take myself too seriously?? DON’T THEY KNOW THAT?!?!
WHO WOULDN’T WANT TO TALK TO ME???? DON’T THEY KNOW WHO I AM????????
LOL I am literally laughing out loud.
It’s a funny thing, how every time we think we have things somewhat figured out, life/God has a way of bringing us back down to earth, amiright?
Apparently it could be something as simple as going to your daughter’s cute little preschool event, and coming back feeling like no one wanted to talk to you.
***
Fortunately, I’ve recovered (ha). Before I go, I wanted to share some Cheap Things That Are Chic I’ve gotten recently, or that are in my shopping cart, that are perfect for the playground or other casual bopping-around. All on-sale and/or very affordable:
A modern pearl necklace
This necklace was a birthday present and it’s currently on sale for 50% off! Mociun is a chic jewelry brand with a shop in Brooklyn. I’ve been more into pearls lately, which is somewhat surprising as they sometimes connote a sort of ultra-preppiness and/or a very girly aesthetic, and neither of those are me. But I’ve found myself wearing my old baroque pearl earring studs that I received as a bridesmaid gift years ago to school runs (similar pairs here and here). And this dainty necklace is the perfect thing to elevate the sweatshirt or T-shirt I’m wearing to the playground, by itself or layered with other necklaces. The small oval shape feels modern (but still classic à la Jackie O3). 14k solid yellow gold clasp—and Mociun jewelry holds its value, as evidenced on The RealReal, though I think you’ll want to hold onto it.
Soft hooded sweatshirt
recommended this one recently. I agree with her that I’m obsessed with wearing sweatshirts but don’t always love hooded ones, as they can be bulky and too tight around the neck. These aren’t either of those things—they’re lightweight and super soft.
A compact umbrella that’s also a conversation starter
In southern California, spring is the rainiest time of year. Compared to other parts of the country it’s usually still not much, but it never hurts to be prepared by keeping a compact umbrella in your mom tote or other large bag. This high-end-looking duck head umbrella that comes in black, red, and yellow was a
rec from last fall. It would have been a great conversation starter for me to carry around at the aforementioned playdate. And of course it’s a hit with the kids.A stylish rain-resistant jacket for under $60
I mentioned Uniqlo (and how famed luxury designer Claire Waight Keller was named their creative director) in my first issue of Cheap Things That Are Chic, last fall. It continues to be a place that fashion people swear by (along with COS), where you can get well-designed basics inexpensively. I’ve talked about my recent obsession with jackets, and now that it’s spring, this one is just what I’ve been looking for. Along with the duck umbrella, it’s perfect for light rain. I like it in beige and black (the other colors are good too if you’re more into wearing color).
Jelly shoes that are priced appropriately
The Row’s $900 jelly shoes last year reportedly broke. Love the Ancient Greek Sandals version, but $125 is still a lot for jellies. I found a more unique clear slip-on pair last year for much less, and I slid them on recently before school pickup. My daughter’s teacher noticed them and told me Target just came out with some that look just like the AGS ones. I almost bought them, but then I saw these from Old Navy and like them even better (great color options too). Whether they’re trendy or not, jellies bring back fond memories of childhood for me, especially as my daughter wears similar pairs (she’s still young enough to love being “twins”). P.S. Old Navy (along with Gap) has upped its game recently, now that Zac Posen has had a chance to settle in as part of their executive team4.
Amazon track shorts
recently mentioned on her podcast that she has a bunch of track shorts from Amazon. These ones are high-waisted, short but not too short, and they have a hidden lining, so you’re covered when you have to bend down, chase kids, etc. They come in tons of good colors and are cute and flattering. Note they run small.
A rose supplement that “opens your heart”
Anima Mundi makes amazing supplements for all sorts of issues (the brand is loved by Melissa Wood Tepperberg and several other health enthusiasts of her ilk). This rose powder was part of another gift, and I’ve been having it in my morning coffee the past few days. It gives the flavor a hint of rose, which reminds me of a particular rose-infused pastry I was enchanted by on a trip to Paris several years ago5. According to Anima Mundi’s website, this rose powder is supposed to support the cardiovascular system, aid digestion, boost mood, reduce inflammation, reduce wrinkles and slow down the aging process, and help increase connection between the self + others by opening the heart.6 Maybe it would have helped me last Saturday, ha.
Xoxo with love,
Cher
My daughter.
My husband.
Slightly related, did you see that there is going to be a new TV series about JFK Jr. & Carolyn Bessette? Omg.
I have a special appreciation for Zac, as he was first becoming well-known on the fashion scene as a young designer, when I was studying fashion in New York. We were born the same year. One of my best friends met him in person back then and said he was the nicest guy. And Zac reposted one of my early F&M instagram posts, when I had no idea what I was doing on instagram (still don’t). I was so thrilled!
I was so enamored with the rose pastry (along with the romance of Paris I’m sure) that I started dreaming of starting my own “rose bakery” in California. When shortly thereafter I learned that bakers usually wake up around 3am, I abandoned the idea—and ended up ordering this classic cookbook instead, lol. There is also a kids version now, so cute.
I am not a doctor and nothing in my newsletter is meant to constitute or substitute for medical advice! I’m sharing my personal experiences with hopes of being helpful. Xo
I really enjoyed reading this. I think everyone has had that experience of being a little let down by a social situation. You described it amusingly. I was glad you concluded it was merely coming back to earth so to speak after your high flying NYC trip, and that you're not taking it too seriously. The next soccer game you may want to really exude that you are interested in the other moms, and see what happens🙂 I liked your duck umbrella 🦆and it even comes in different colors! ☂️⛱️And the sweatshirt, raincoat and seed pearl necklace. You have such style and taste💃